Last year, I set about conducting a semicolon experiment.
Through adding a sentence through every semicolon mistake (and with most classes prepped on the dangers and misuse of semicolons), here is the final statement, in all its gl0ry. I was running out of things to say by the end, which is probably apparent.
Never use semicolons. College students misuse them, and this hurts your grade. I can’t emphasize this enough. I wish I got paid per instance of semicolon misuse. I would be a very rich man. Ask yourself—does this sentence contain two separate phrases that have complete subjects and predicates? The sentence in question does not. Or, perhaps you added an inappropriate capitalization. Or, perhaps you meant to put in a colon, though that is really a terrible thing to put in a sentence. Or perhaps you accidentally typed it, and missed it on the read-through? Some students (incorrectly) believe that it adds an element of sophistication to their writing. Instead, it reveals a lack of knowledge. This is certainly a safe environment to learn, and try new things. However, you need to make sure you try them correctly. Indeed, did it help your writing to bring in an unnecessary element? I bet that it did not. To make matters worse, it probably cost you points. You could have used these points to improve your GPA. I’m not, however, saying that using semicolons will inhibit your performance in college. However, I will say using them will not help it. I ponder why students continue to use them. Could it be the wanton desire to hurt one’s grade? Perhaps the concept of a complete subject and predicate remains a mystery, untaught in schools? At this point, I don’t know who to blame. Is it the fault of teachers? Is it a dysfunctional education system that encourages teaching to the test? Is it the decline of grammar lessons in school? Is it the fault of Kobe Bryant? Donald Trump? Hillary Clinton? Your ninth-grade English teacher?